The United States of Cursing

"Be the change you want to see in the world" ~Gandhi

Photo Cliff Scholz

So much has been written and said about the political and other divisions that seem to have grown deeper in the United States in recent years. I say “seem” because the reporting on these divisions itself registers with me at times as being calculated to promote further division, so it’s worth keeping tabs on that. People are probably more in agreement than the media would have us believe.

Still, and possibly in some measure due to the influence of the “race-to-the-bottom” media, I’m also getting the sense that more and more people seem to think it’s okay to disparage, to disrespect, and to treat whole groups of our fellow citizens with something other than compassionate regard or at least tolerance. Divided as people may be over politics and party affiliation, over the meaning of unfolding events and so on, there seems to be a growing consensus that it’s okay to call people names, to ridicule, to wish ill upon and to curse others. And yes, it looks like this shift is being promoted. It’s not super hard to convince traumatized people to project their trauma onto others. And the beat goes on.

Thing about name-calling is, same as when we were kids on playgrounds, in net effect it makes the playground a less pleasant place to play in. In the life of a nation, it makes life worse.

Sure, we have and will always have political differences — different preferences of candidate, different ideas of what is real, how the world works, of who is to be believed, of what’s going on and what’s to be done about it — these are the ‘divisions,’ as some would call it. And that’s okay. But again, what if underneath all that “division” we start to participate in this deeper consensus that it’s okay to be mean-spirited in the midst of our disagreements? That it’s fine to condemn and curse other people? Most of my readers here are based in the US, so let me just ask: What happens if we start to behave as if we are citizens of The United States of Cursing?

Seems to me that to the extent this happens — that is, to the extent we allow ourselves to shift en masse away from respecting, honoring and blessing and toward cursing — we’re navigating toward a progressively accursed way of being. This is the under-appreciated risk in being united by cursing in unison. It may appear that because people are on different sides of various issues that the cursing is dividing us, but on a fundamental level, cursing is cursing. It doesn’t make much difference, at least not so much as we tend to think, exactly what we’re cursing. In the end, by cursing, people are united in making similar kinds of awful noises. And because in unity is strength, the risk is, next thing you know we could end up united in our frustration, united in deteriorating value systems, united in trauma and despair, all of which can grow stronger when we are united in this way.

This isn’t to say we can’t have our differences. It’s more about the place we occupy within ourselves as we work our differences out. And with so much focus on outward words and actions — which are worth paying attention to — it’s also worth pointing out that the subtle things matter, too, and in fact may be primary. Our unspoken animosities, judgments, and any derisive jeers and sneers we carry inside us contort our emotional posture even if we never speak, outwardly express or act them out, never do a thing about them. Whatever we carry inside us, however well hidden, becomes part of the collective environment, and in fact the hiding itself does likewise. Whatever we are, and however we are, we broadcast this from our inner circuitry into the shared commons.

Good news is, this is one place where I’m 100% sure that every vote counts. We’re all voting with our entire being, all the time. At every moment we’re casting a vote for the kind of world we want to be a part of.